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Saturday, November 13, 2010

A Malaysian Tale 3

1) Rafidah, Shahrizat & Jean Abdullah meet GOD onJudgement Day.

GOD says 'I understand all of you are from Malaysia , which
to the Bumis, is also known as 'heaven-on-earth'. Here too you all shall
be treated according to status. You shall meet the who's who of the
Malaysian cream of the crop.

You can see two giant gates over there. On one is stated Bumi & the
other Non-Bumi. Just go to the respective gates & mention your name. BUT
remember, should your claim turns out to be false, you shall be condemned to the
tortures of hell for all eternity and lose any chance of
redemption whatsoever."

Jean goes over first. She stands outside the Bumi
gate and mentions her name. The digital display flashes "DLL" and a ear-
piercing alarm rings out. The gate opens to reveal a chamber of raging fire of
intense heat. 'Welcome to hell' booms a burly turbaned Sikh as he pulls her
in. His name tag reads as Irwan Shah Abdullah@DJ Dave@Sukhdave Singh.

Rafidah & Shahrizat are caught by surprise but smile at each other
knowingly. Next goes Shahrizat. She too stands outside the Bumi gate &
mentions her name. The digital display screen flashes "MAMAK" and
another ear-piercing alarm triggers. The gate opens to reveal an icy
cold chamber way below freezing point. 'Welcome home, I'm Mamoothy', says
a sarcastic voice who's name tag reads as Mahathir s/o Mohd Kutty.

Rafidah who is very sure of qualifying, walks over haughtily to the gate
which she feels is her birth-right. Just as she mentions her name, the digital
display flashes "INDIAN" .There is a thunderous flash and the gate opens to
reveal a pot-bellied figure with a trident in hand & nothing else on
except a wig. A familiar voice rings out 'Selamat datang Paduka, Kemaluan saya
amat besar, tetapi walaubagaimana pun.......'.He can't go on as he is
salivating and panting heavily. She is too shocked for words and turns
around in time to hear GOD say just before the gate closes forever "Your
particulars in our record shows your middle name to
be AP instead of binti....."

2)  AP birthday to you
AP birthday to you
AP birthday to rAPidah
AP birthday to you

Many AP returns of the day, rAPidah!

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